Too Young
by Team M
Summary: She finally realized, that maybe it was the fact she was too young. She couldn't take the pain any longer. Niley oneshot.


He was my savoir, always looking out for me when I knew no one else was. He cared when no one did. Mandy wanted to sneak me into a club with her one night, he disagreed not allowing me to go. There was an argument, but after I couldn't sleep. By midnight I had called to apologize, and thank him for saving both me, and my career. I was too young for that.

He knew what was best for me. He was the one that kept my career going for years, it was all because of him that I even was the 'it' girl at all. When he left I was afraid of everything from the biggest things like love, to the most unreasonable like coming out of my room. I was scared to death.

The first few weeks that is exactly what I did. I sat in my room and stared at the wall. I came out for a performance, once to die my hair, and that was it. I didn't eat and it was obvious that my family was worried but I was selfish, I didn't care. I was too young for that.

Truth; even now I barely know Aly or AJ. In fact, they were last minute replacements. The boys left once Nick did, they couldn't stand being with me. I was old news to them. By the time Aly and AJ got there it was too late, I was in the pool of rejection. Thinking back I was practically a zombie. I said 'Hi', 'Bye', even the occasional 'What's up?' but I wasn't into it. I bet if Nick was there he would tell me to be more cheerful, then again if he was there I wouldn't have made all those changes to begin with.

I was a wreck.

A month later I got home. Mandy was fed up with all of it, forcing me to at least act happy. She said she hated seeing me glum, down, broken, and now that we were both home she would fix it. A few hours after she left, I decided to fix it on my own. I decided to try cutting. That did fix it, for an hour. Which is why I went back for more.

A week after that was the Concert Movie Premiere. I would have to see them there, I couldn't avoid them. It would be awkward, and there would be tension, but of course we would all ignore that. We had to be best friends for their publicity. As much as they tried to avoid me we did run into each other, it was the last time I would ever see Kevin smile at me. Nick, he simply avoided me, and Joe, he wasn't sure what to do. He gave me a hug, but had to run off. I understood though. Bro's before hoes.

I couldn't stop myself when Seventeen called the next day. So I made my first mistake, I accepted the interview. My second was made shortly after, answering the question to Nick. Admitting the facts, nothing but the truth. I needed him, it was a big world, I had big dreams, he was the boy who actually understood. I loved him, and people can deny as much as they want, but I did. I spent months of nights crying myself to sleep, no break. Amazing what make-up can do. Then, after I would get asked a question in an interview that I couldn't break in.

The next month the Vanity Fair pictures were released. My second mistake. The downfall. My parents may have approved, but America did not. The paparazzi increased, I was asked only about those photo's. Most importantly, I was no longer a role model, I was the next Britney. No longer even earning the name Miley. Through all this, I couldn't stop wondering one thing. What would happen if he would have been there watching me, what would he have thought?

Yet, the story gets better. My life gets better. I looked on the web one day and there was the headline. Miley Cyrus Hacked?

That I was. My pictures - our pictures - were no longer our secret. They were out for the world to see. Did he ever make a comment about how they weren't just my fault, did he ever make a comment saying how he had wanted them, even how they were sent to him? Of course he didn't. Joseph, he did. He was the only one who may have slightly still cared. I couldn't help but doubt the thought.

7 Things was released. At first, I wasn't so sure about it, but Brandi pulled the final string. She was right, he did hurt me, he did hate me too, and it was over, so what did it matter? The truth of it was, he probably wouldn't ever hear it. He probably wouldn't ever care. In fact, he might even laugh at how pathetic I was. I didn't know anymore.

Later that year, I released my first CD as Miley, no Hannah Montana connection. I learned something that first day. I learned that people do read the Thank You section, they read every last word. At the end where I put my section on how I would always love my Prince, it was no mystery of who that person must be. They all knew exactly who. I had to lie on the topic of Bottom Of the Ocean saying it was about a dead goldfish. We all know, that it wasn't. A love song like that cannot be written about a goldfish, my favorite song wouldn't be about a goldfish. That was my favorite song because that was my song to Nick, my questions to Nick.

They still aren't answered.

August was when the message was clearly recieved. Kevin stepped out into the paparazzi wearing that shirt. The sun had this way of glinting on it, making the gold letters stand out. Team Demi and Selena. Mandy came over at once, at first I didn't get it, but then I understood perfectly fine. She was there for me to cry on once I found out his betrayal. Sure, I had suspected it before now, but I didn't want to face it. I had to then, I had to get it through my head that they weren't coming back, they hated me, and they didn't miss me, they had the replacements to love now. I cried myself to sleep then too. Why? Because I was too young for that.

I forgave them all somehow. Even now, I hold absolutely no grudge against them. It's my fault. All of it is, if we didn't fight so much back then, maybe we could still be together. If I didn't take them on my tour, maybe we could have worked through being apart during their tour. Then again, as much as they do hate me, we both know that my tour was the one that really got them discovered. My tour was the one that showed people their talent and fame. It was my tour, they ate off the fame. But I forgave them for that too, for not even saying a thank you. The problem is forgiveness is something I haven't granted myself with.

A month ago my sixteenth birthday passed. I was at the American Music Awards, and to be honest, I didn't want to go. They would be there. Still, there was a glimmer of hope that they would say 'Happy Birthday', acknowledge who used to be 'their everything'. They didn't though, and I turned another year older without them.

Funny thing is, that night I cried. I picked up my phone thinking about sending them a congrats message, but I didn't. I decided against that, because we had nothing now. In fact, I'd be surprised if they still knew my phone number. To them, I was nothing more than an inksmudge on a newspaper. That night, on my birthday, I cried myself to sleep, letting the mascara run down my pale cheek. I got every single material thing I wanted, but I didn't get what my heart had been longing for. Him. And that caused pain.

Now, looking at everything I have, the fame, the money, the friends, I start to wonder if this is really what I want. It was my dream years ago, but things change. I keep messing up, day after day, because that's what people want to see, including my friends. They don't protect me from the paparazzi like he did. The pressure of trying to be as perfect as possible so that I'm not really replaced is insane, I try not to think of it, but now they're everywhere I look, taunting how much fun I used to have. Most of all, I am hurt beyond repair. I am broken beyond repair, no one to fix me. I don't know who to turn to, or who to trust. I'm just like every other teenager out there, lost. Confused. Harmed. Even betrayed. All of this is too much, sometimes I wonder why I wanted to be famous so bad.

Which is why I finally realize, I'm too young for this.


End file.
